Peace Flutters

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Peace Flutters

An illusion of obtainability

Just out of reach

Sometimes brushing my finger

But only in that fateful moment

Before something falls

I drown inside of myself 

Tears run

Wishing for something 

For peace

Poem 190 ~ 12/29/2013

     My soul reaches out to those in pain.  Those who have lost family, friends, or acquaintances.  Every turn of the earth clocks pain.  Humans forget to have humanity.   Pleasure is gained from hurt.  Hatred is confused with religious zealousness.  Fear of difference fuels violence. To those in France, I extend my heart to you.  I mourn with you.  To all the world, I cry for peace. 

     People can do such beautiful things.  How strange it sometimes feels to see the other side of the coin. 

     Why can we not have peace? Why can we not learn to respect differences and not hurt others because of them? When will we learn to treat others as ourselves?  How can me learn to all love? 

     No matter how much we wish... peace is an idea.  It is never a true and global reality.  The fact that so many strive for it is folly and beauty in itself.  We reach out hoping fingers to those in pain, to those who hurt others, to those who love, and those who hate.  We hope for the change that cannot be.  Yet, by doing so we make our own reality that much better.  We help those who we can touch.  Peace and love, no matter how delusional it may seem, is something worth reaching for.  For even though it may never rest upon the world all at once, we can create something worthwhile. 

     I drown in myself, for I mourn with those who mourn.  

     Let us mourn, hope and reach for peace... together. 

Something Beyond "Self"

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     Sitting, we share poetry.  Bits and pieces of our souls are spilled into the air of our local library, at an open mic event.  Sifting through lines of varying shades of "good."  We listen.  Looking at the faces of those laughing, crying, and stoic... I saw and I learned.

     Pain is life.  For everyone it brings its own sting.  Some experience the loss of a parent, grandparent, child, or friend.  Others experience being abused by someone you should be able to trust.  For some the greatest pain is hate of oneself.  For still others being shunned by peers and experiencing bullying is apart of life.  We all hurt, and it is all different.  Even if you meet someone who has gone through the same circumstance as you, their experience is different.

     For many of us in the world we cling to a higher power, something beyond ourselves.  Not only christians do this, but Hindu, Islamic, and Buddhist religions look towards higher beings.  Even those who don't believe in a God or supreme being(s) sometimes turn to science as a a higher source of truth.  However, we sometimes forget to look beside us.  Debates arise between people, and we set up walls and barriers.  We claim our pain as ours.  Sometimes it is what makes us feel "unique."  But pain is one of the things that should really bind us.

     Yes, a mother loosing her teenage daughter to a marriage full of abuse, and loneliness is different then a mother who watches her child move from California to New York.  However, they are both mothers.  Even if they cannot empathize, they can sympathize.  We can hold each other, wipe tears, offer solace and simply... be there. We should look at each other as what we are, human.  We are connected.

     Those I shared my pain with, they didn't make a big deal, they didn't see me cry.  But they looked into my eyes, and saw me.  The walls that could have stood (my religion, gender attraction, schooling differences, dress, and appearance) were broken down between us.  Maybe not forever, but for that moment. And that moment matters.

Christianity is?

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     Christianity.  It is something simple. Christianity is to have a belief in Christ. It is a belief in the words of the New Testament.

     So then, why would it ever need be asked, "What is Christianity?"

     In the world their are LDS believers, "Mormons" if you will. They live and worship around the globe. The official name of their religion is "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints."  I am among this group of people. We all believe in Christ. We read the bible, and those with true faith turn to our Savior as our Reedemer and Salvation.  In every sense of the term, we believe in Christ. 

     When I was around 8 I was informed, by a friend of mine, that I didn't believe in Christ. My young friend informed that my soul was in peril. I refuted her words saying, "I'm mormon. I believe in Christ. We all do." She looked at me and simply stated, "Well your not Christian... So my mom says your going to hell." 

     At age 8 I was confused. Believeing in Christ and his purpose is the definition of Christianity. Thus, I was a Christian.

     As I have grown I have become more able to say with certainty that I am a Christian. Yet, increasingly I have found that my non-mormon friends do not agree with me. Many times I have asked why, and increasingly I have found that... People don't know. They don't know why they consider Mormons "non-Christian." They just know they do. Many parroting, as my friend did, "My parents say!" Or, "My pastor told us." 

     I have learned to accept that Mormons aren't considered to be Christian, among many main stream christian sects. Leaving one fundamental thing to bug me. And that is, I am. I feel and know for myself that Christ is my Savior and Redeemer. Because of this faith, I wish to glorify him. I wish my actions to reflect his love, mercy, and example. I wish to lead others to Christ, and I wish my life to be a reflection of his. How though can others be led to Christ if they do not see me as a Christian? 

     Well... They can, if I have faith. I can live to glorify him, and pray that my works can reflect my Savior's glory. For it is through him, and him alone, that mankind may be saved. I can live hoping that my actions will speak louder then others learned notions. For if Christ is with me, his Spirit will testify.

     No matter what teachings may cloud the human mind, the Holy Spirit can always point to truth, and to Christ.