Lessons Learned from Dating

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     In every culture there is a different way of going about dating.  Some date one boy in particular and give him everything, others go out with many people and treat it as simply a way to become better friends.  Whatever you do, and how you go about it... I think you learn lessons from dating.  Over the last bit that I have been allowed to date (16 is when people in my religion may begin to date), I have treated it several different ways.  

     There are the friends who I have asked out on group dates, in order to just get to know them better.  There are the boys who I have liked and called "boyfriend."  Their are boys who I have adored and sorta gone out with, but we never called it anything.  All of these boys, however we defined our dates, were a risk of the heart I hold.  Not necessarily were they an opportunity for my heart to be broken, or hurt.  But they all were an opportunity to have my heart changed.  

     Every person you meet in this world has an opportunity to change you somehow. Maybe just a little. But they have the opportunity to change you in some degree. The closer we let people, the more opportunity they have to change us, to influence us. And to go on a date is the step up from hanging out.  Thus, it makes sense that people we go on dates, or a date, with would have more opportunity to shape us as a person.  

     The heart starts out ours, and slowly it changes.  It grows.  Family, friends, crushes, acquaintances, bullies.  They all tie in making us who we are.  Some introduce us to sushi.  A few to snub remarks about hair.  Others show us Folk Music.  Many introduce pieces of us, that weren't but now are.  Dating is... something where we say we are willing to open ourselves up to someone.  We will allow those people to influence us somehow.  We are open to it.  We embrace it to some extent.  

     The healing of a long hug; the pain of being ignored; the finding that you like theater popcorn; figuring out you cannot stand super strong cologne; that you enjoy being asked if your comfortable; that you like boys who laugh at things you say; that you don't like boys who never make their own jokes; the building up of your confidence in a talent; or the weakening of one of your aspirations.  These are things you can learn from dating, and which shape who you are.  Done casually or seriously, dating is an opportunity to let things be added to your knowledge, and to your heart. 

     The heart is a pieced together thing.  Always changing.  Growing, shrinking, hurting, reaching.  Dating is often fun, and should be enjoyable.  The important thing is to remember, however you go about it... be wise as to whom you welcome, and open your heart to.  We cannot exactly choose who we have feelings for.  But we can keep such feelings from turning into love.  We can choose who we will invite to touch our soul, our heart, our mind.  The lessons I have learned are many.  But this one encompasses them all: Go wisely, for the hearts sake.  

Traditional Mexican VS Tex-Mex Cusine

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     After first moving to New York, my family and I were lamenting not knowing where any good Mexican Restaurants were located.  Someone that we know piped up, "Oh I know where a good Mexican place is!" Excitedly we asked where the restaurant was, and what it was named.  Our friend told us that the restaurant was located in Canandaigua and it was called Taco Bell. Somewhat taken aback I repeated, "Taco Bell."  Her response was, "Exactly!" Having grown up visiting the South-West every summer, and having been raised by South-Western parents, I have learned to appreciate Mexican cuisine   Taco Bell, though tasty and nice when you're on the run, has never been my idea of Mexican food.  Huevos Rancheros, pico de gallo, and tacos de haring are all dishes that I am used to seeing and ordering.

     After talking with my friend about where to find good Mexican, I realized that "Mexican food" isn't always the easiest thing to understand.  I wanted to learn what authentic Mexican cuisine actually was.  What makes a dish non-Mexican? Why do so many American's think of chimichanga, hard tacos, and fajitas as true Mexican? At the time I thought about these things.  However, it wasn't until this semester of Spanish that I decided to actually study it, and see what I could learn.

     I read many articles, but being a tactile person I really wondered what the difference truly was.  Different ingredients, different dishes, and a bit of history give us the difference between authentic Mexican, and what is known as Tex-Mex.  But I wanted to know how it would taste, and what it would be like to make a dish from the two cuisines.  I want to take you through this journey with me, and along the way I will show you what I learned.

     When I decided to head South of the border, I choose pozole as my meal.  Pozole is a traditional Mexican soup.  This authentic dish is believed to have originated as far back as the aztecs.  Now a days there are many variations and tweaks that people will make to this dish.  I personally really wanted to keep it simple and make a very traditional, and basic pozole.  After going through many recipes I went with the one that seemed to best fit my desire for authenticity as much as possible. 

Cast of Characters

     The recipe I used called for a pork shoulder, garlic, hominy, salt, cumin, as well as stock or water.  Chile pequin was in the list of garnishes, however after being unable to find it at any stores I found what is considered a substitute, ground cayenne red pepper.  I decided to make it an ingredient rather then just a garnish, as that was what many recipes recommended.  

Communal Pot

      In Mexican culture Lunch is generally the biggest meal of the day.  It is a time to socialize, and connect with family and friends.  A bigger pot then this would be needed in order to let everyone eat a hearty and filling meal!

Hominy

     Hominy is maize, white or yellow, which has had its kernel removed.  I bought canned hominy, for convince.  But if you wanted to hunt down dried hominy you would soak it for 8 or so hours, and then let it simmer for an hour or more, to bring it to the soft and puffy state that is needed for pozole.  Though I can't say hominy is never used in a Tex-Mex dish, I can say that I have never seen it in a Tex-Mex dish.  Leading to my conclusion that hominy is sadly undervalued in the Tex-Mex community.

Garlic

      Garlic is used in many recipes, and is considered to be one of the more authentic ingredients in Mexican cuisine.  All the pozole recipes I found, and many other authentic dishes, contained a great amount of garlic.  This recipe went a little light on the garlic.  What with calling for only 3-5 cloves.  Though garlic is generally considered to be authentically Mexican, it was introduced by the Spaniards upon coming into contact with the Mexican culture.

        Though this piece in Mexican cuisine was introduced with the Spanish, it has become so ingrained and widely used in true-blue Mexican dishes that it rightfully takes it's place as an authentic ingredient.  In some Tex-Mex garlic is used.  However when it comes to chains such as taco bell, chipotle, Moe's Southwest grill, and others like them, garlic is often left to the wayside.  If you can find a proper Mexican restaurant though you'll find that garlic is present in many dishes.

Blending it All 

      At this point I combined the whole pork shoulder, clover garlic, rinsed hominy, salt, cumin, as well as stock into the pot. The flavors contained in these ingredients are the ones that will permeate in this dish.  They will make the base flavor that can latter be built upon. 

The Cooking

    The soup then was brought to a boil.  After boiling I turned it down to low, and let it simmer for two hours.  The chili, garlic, and pork blended into a perfect aroma, and it hung around the house for days.  

Shredding the Pork

     I took out the pork and let it cool before shredding it.  I wanted to get my mind a little more involved with this though, so I dug around for some history.  As I expected, pozole, like many things, has evolved over time.  The particular recipe I used is one that plausibly has been around for 100's of years.  When I did some more research I saw that the meat choice is what kept this recipe from dating back to the aztecs.  Pozole is thought to have originally been made after human sacrifice rituals, and would be made with the meat of the sacrifices.  This practice fell out of use, due to the Spaniards discomfort with cannibalism.  Human flesh was replaced with Pork.  Thus, pork is now what is authentically associated with Pozole.  Some newer meat choices would be chicken, and beef.

Garnishes

     This is where you see a lot of the differences in traditional Mexican food and Tex-Mex.  Pinto beans, white rice, garlic, onion, avocado, limes, chilies, and white cheese (such as queso blanco, queso Oaxaca, queso panela, añejo, etc.) are all signs of an authentic Mexican meal.  Mexican is often spicy, and contains contrasting colors as well as flavors.  The cheese is always lightly put on, and never the luminescent yellow we are so used to in America.  

     The differences between traditional Mexican, and Tex-Mex are often small.  Tex-Mex came out of Mexico.  When Texan's replaced corn with wheat, and vegetables with more cheese, and white cheese with yellow it started the Tex-Mex cuisine.  Tex-Mex has grown to be fuller of fats, and oils and left behind the abundance of veggies, and spiciness.

     Though Tex-Mex is most certainly delicious and appealing to our American fast buds, Mexican will hold it's own.  As it has for centuries.  I found it interesting to learn more about Mexican cuisine.  I will most definitely desire to remake this recipe again, and find more authentic recipes to try.  Although I like the super cheesy nachos, hard shelled tacos, and refried bean burritos served at so many Tex-Mex places, I will understand better what true Mexican is.  I am glad that this class gave me the chance to learn more about this.  I will never again look at Tex-Mex the same, and I will always favor true Mexican, and all it's wonderful flavors and colors.  

Further Reading: 

"Tex-Mex." Dictionary.com. Dictionary.com, n.d. Web. 15 Nov. 2014.

"America's 15 Best Tex-Mex Chain Restaurants (Slideshow)." The Daily Meal. The Daily Meal, n.d. Web. 15 Nov. 2014.

Goyanes, Cristina. "What's Really Inside That Taco Bell Crunchy Beef Taco?" LIVESTRONG.COM. LIVESTRONG.COM, 01 May 2014. Web. 18 Oct. 2014.

Lapetina, Adam. "What's the Difference between Tex-Mex and REAL Mexican

Food?" Thrillist. N.p., 30 Apr. 2014. Web. 18 Oct. 2014.

Fitzsimons, Jo. "Everything You Need to Know About Traditional Mexican Food and Drink." BootsnAll. BootsnAll, 25 Sept. 2012. Web. 18 Oct. 2014.

Willett, Megan. "9 Authentic Mexican Dishes You Should Eat Instead Of The Tex-Mex Knockoffs." Business Insider. Business Insider, Inc, 01 Sept. 2014. Web. 18 Oct. 2014.

"La Crónica De Hoy | Los Mexicanos Prehispánicos Comían Pozole Con Carne Humana." La Crónica De Hoy | Los Mexicanos Prehispánicos Comían Pozole Con Carne Humana. N.p., 11 Feb. 2013. Web. 13 Dec. 2014.

Jinich, Pati. "Tex-Mex Cooking: It's Not Mexican, and Maybe That's the Point." Washington Post. The Washington Post, 28 Jan. 2014. Web. 13 Dec. 2014.

"Pozole Recipe (Mexican Pork and Hominy Stew)." Whats4eats. N.p., 27 July 2008. Web. 13 Dec. 2014.

"Mexican Eating Habits - The Mexican Culture's Ways of Eating." Ixtapa Mexican Grill & Cantina. N.p., 04 Dec. 2012. Web. 14 Dec. 2014.

Alfaro, Danilo. "What Is the Definition of Hominy?" About Food. N.p., n.d. Web. 14 Dec. 2014.

Thank You!

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     Recently I hit 3,500 views.  It hit and I was freakin' out.  (Yes spell check claims that "freakin'" isn't a word... it is people. It is.)

     I was just so pleased.  My thoughts have been taken in and considered 3000+ times! I was just like, "Did you see that? Are you seeing this? Oh my goodness... maybe I actually can write interesting things!"  And this, clearly and most logically, led to Twilight.

     I mean.... "write interesting things." What is that?  Twilight gave teenage girls everywhere something easy, wanted, and fluffy to read.  Kinda like whipped cream.  Who doesn't like spraying rich, creamy, fluffy, digestible whipped cream into their mouth?!?  Okay... maybe those allergic to milk... but you get what I'm trying to say.  Twilight was written poorly, it came in a cheap can, yet it fed teen girls what they wanted complete with a cherry on top.  As a generalization girls want to be seen, desired, loved, and know that there guy will be proud of her, and fight for her.  Bella had nothing interesting about her.  So, if it could happen for her, couldn't it happen for anyone??

     Twilight was a classic, and rather potent case of giving an audience what they want.

     Bleak House, and Les Miserables however are examples of books that didn't give what an audience what they wanted.  Instead they gave what was needed.  

     They gave thought, and talent, rather then sugar coated desire. 

     So when I go to my blog to update, check, and write new content... and I see that I have now reached the thousands.  I look at it and hope with all my heart that there are views because what I say is actually interesting, thoughtful, and lovely.

     When I first started this blog, I really wanted to get my ideas out. I wanted to let my thoughts be read.  That dream is being fulfilled, and it has gone infinitely better then I thought it would.  I now have more then 3 views... From my mom. I have over 3,000 from people I know, and those I don't!

     Thank you to all those who have viewed, and will view my thoughts.  I love that, even for a brief moment, our souls can be joined through my writing and your reading.